Mary Schmidt Marketing Troubleshooter

I’m currently reading Your Call Is Important to Us: The Truth About Bulls*** I got to page 5 and was already starting to nod my head in emphatic agreement, by page 25 I’m grinning in rueful self-recognition…and so on…I may be running amok with an Uzi by the end.

But seriously folks - we live in a society in which cynicism is the last refuge of the disappointed (defeated?) idealist. Of course, we’ve always had master shovelers of biosolids. What’s different in the 21st century is the sheer volume, diversity and -ahem - richness of the bovine biosolids.

Here’s where the Web is both good and bad. It’s growing increasingly difficult to “get away” with things these days (at least in theory); people will be on-line in a nanosecond dissecting every word and image (down to that ridiculous hoo-ha about President Bush’s “potty break note”). But, are the people hopping online: a. sufficiently informed to accurately analyze/criticize; b. doing anything other than preaching to the choir? Another downer: the age-old flim-flam has moved to the Web and the tent show for the rubes is now multi-media, interactive, flashy & splashy - which makes it that all that much harder to realize there’s no little man behind the curtain at all.

I’m determined to remain an optimist (albeit a cynical one.) We can make a difference if we choose to - as both vendors/service providers and customers. Part of that difference is remembering to be accountable on either side of the sales transaction and that common courtesy should be just that - common. Which brings me to:

The Accountable & Courteous List:

1. “Idiots” have feelings too. Before I go into major rage mode with a customer service rep, I’ve resolved to remember they’re very likely stuck in a beige cubicle (or even a prison cell), with a canned script and a process over which they have no power. I find I get much better results when I talk to the rep as if they’re - good grief! - a fellow human being.

2. Set expectations up front (and keep it simple.) All too often when signing a deal, we get so wrapped up in making sure every term and condition is spelled out, we defeat the purpose. (”We told you that on page 25, paragraph 2, line 5.”). This is where the credit card companies have raised shoveling to a world-class art. I see this in even the simplest deals - what I initially said/wrote may not be what the other person wanted to hear or remembers. The other party may not be trying to get away with something at all - he/she/they may honestly not remember or know.

3. Be a good prospect. So, I don’t return those follow-up calls about a detailed proposal I asked for? So what? They’re “just” trying to sell something to me and I’m the customer! Well, not only is this just tacky - the shoe could be on the other foot one of these days. (Admit it, we’re all guilty of this one at one time or another.) Remember, there’s a person on the other end of the line, with bills to pay and friends to tell about you.

I’d say telemarketers are exempt from this one - after all they’re interrupting my dinner hour. But, no. (See #1 and #3 above.) So, I don’t have to be nasty. I can simply say “no thank you” and hang up. I don’t have to waste their time or “take revenge.” Again, it’s a fellow human being on the other end of the line. Maybe not a nice one, but you don’t know that - and they’re trying to earn a living. Making cold calls is no fun for 99.9% of the population. I know - I’ve done it in years past for market surveys and it’s brutal.

Enough for now - I’d be interested in your comments (and if you’ve read the book.)

Tags:
customer service
marketing
telemarketing
books