The Magical, Mystical Mission Statement!
I just finished a client project which required my reading a whole lot of company overviews, “about us” statements and general marketing hoo-ha. (”Mommy, make it stop! They’re talking about ’solutions’ again!”)
So, thought I’d start a little side-line business - for only $4.98 (no checks please) - here’s your very own magical, mystical “one size fits all” mission statement:
“We provide the premier (optional: insert industry or tech descriptor here) solution to enable our valued customers to enhance their profitability and achieve innovative world-class results.”
(Yep, that’ll also get your employees all fired up!)
And, for only $1.98 extra, here’s your all-purpose company description:
(Company name) is the leading supplier of world-class (and/or global - if you’ve ever sold a jar in a Tijuana flea market) solutions for the (insert name of industry) sector. We serve Fortune 500 companies with quality, integrity and commitment to results.” Our innovative, leading-edge (insert tech jargon) solution is used by strategic partners world-wide to achieve best-in-class results.
And, that’s not all! For a limited time, here’s an absolutely free bonus tip! Make it as difficult as possible to actually contact you if they land on your web site (I’m still looking for the headquarters - heck, even a phone number - for one of those “leading, major, global, premier provider of integrated product and service solutions”).
Okay, I’ve got that out of my system. Seriously, your mission statement shouldn’t be wordsmithed to death. It should actually mean something to people (particularly within your company). That company description? Be careful it doesn’t sound like what all your competitors are saying! Lastly, make sure any description actually describes what you do, (I had to read some of these things twice and three times or go another page or two deep to figure out what the company actually does.)
Related Post: But, what do you do?
Tags: business development, entrepreneur sanity check, mission statement, web marketing
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September 1st, 2006 at 7:57 am
Mary, this is great! Don’t forget to add that “our employees are our greatest asset”. This really gets the staff pumped up when they get zero bonus while the CEO rakes in millions.
September 6th, 2006 at 11:21 am
I absolutely loved your web page re: Mission statements. I was searching as I created (past tense) mine. At the risk of sounding too much like my competitors, Alpha Facility Services, Inc will not have one for now. We are a janitorial company and have always retained customers with premium services. Pricing is competetive but not always the issue. Take care of the customer or somone else will!
What a refreshing site in the middle of the afternoon.
Oscar Arreola
Owner
May 2nd, 2007 at 8:05 am
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August 2nd, 2007 at 7:28 am
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