Mary Schmidt Marketing Troubleshooter

Yesterday, I visited a friend’s home in Santa Fe that she has been renovating for what seems like forever. It should have been done long before now…but it’s been the all-too-typical tale of contractors not showing up; cost overruns; and incomplete work that stays that way for months. She sighed, “But I guess I’ve got to keep the guy until I finish.” Maybe not.

In today’s NYT there’s a big article about the dropping contractor rates for home renovations. Seems bids that were - say - $250,000 a year ago are now coming in at half that…and the actual projects are ahead of schedule and under budget.

“…Before, they would take a month to get back to you and would have turned down small jobs. Now, they’ll take anything and start right away.”

Hmmm…too bad that the contractors weren’t this reasonable and responsive back in boom times. They might not be facing such tough times now.

Methinks the contractors need to do a long overdue and permanent renovation of their own customer service policies…along with many other troubled companies out there - from credit cards to computers. (All together now, “Well, DUH!, Mary!”)

P.S. My favorite home renovation movies: Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House; The Money Pit; and Under The Tuscan Sun (I couldn’t care less about the manufactured happy “she found a man!” ending for Diane Lane in Sun; it’s watching the gorgeous old villa being renovated that makes me happy…that and the cooking scenes.) Hey, I think I just decided what movies I’ll be watching this weekend….right after I finish hauling rocks around the garden…too bad my landscaper hasn’t been in touch lately; now, just where did I put that bid???

Tags: marketing, marketing troubleshooting, customer service

I LOVE olives - especially the really big ones you get in ‘toonis in the better bars (When I worked as a cocktail waitress during college, the bar owner said he should charge me for dinner…I scarfed down a truly obscene amount every evening.)

Yesterday, I took a client to Nob Hill Bar & Grill here in Albuquerque for adult beverages between meetings with investors and such. I (natch) ordered a ‘tooni (with Maytag blue cheese stuffed olives). They unfortunately didn’t have food service since they had problems with their hot water…which was no big deal since we were only there for drinks anyway.

However, the manager (owner?) dropped by to see how we doing and to apologize for the lack of food service…and he offered to bring me more olives after I joked I’d already had dinner…

So, he brought more BIG olives…AND chips and a selection of three freshly-made dips…free of charge and with a smile.

Nob Hill turned a problem into a positive. What have you done for your customers lately - free of charge and with a smile?

Tags: marketing, marketing troubleshooting, customer service

Don’t try to sell them anything else. Talk about adding insult to injury! And, believe me, we’re talk, talk, talkin’ these days.

This means:

Update your web site so when they log into their account, they don’t see new c’mons. In fact, don’t let them log in to begin with…but do have a specific message telling them why - not the generic “can’t access at this time.” or “system not responding. Please try again later.”

Quit sending junk mail.

Quit sending “valued customers” “use your miles!” and “special offer” emails.

Yes, this requires some behind-the-scenes systems integration and communication. But, otherwise, you’re doing what Am Ex is doing with me…spending time and money trying to sell more to a “preferred cardholder” they “fired” (and royally ticked off re my “credit delinquencies” ???! Zero balances, never late…but I hadn’t used the cards for a while). Those glossy bi-fold mailers? Right into the recycling bin. Ditto the goofball “pre-approved” offers. I do find it mildly amusing that they continue to send me c’mons re how I can use my miles…yes, those 19,000+ miles they canceled on me.

It’s one thing to fire customers (even when it’s the right thing to do) - it’s quite another to make them so furious they go on a negative word-of-mouth mission. Just google American Express Problems and you’ll see what I mean. Ouch!

(Wee Tactical Tip: When buying lists and working with direct mail houses, require “merge and purge.” And think once, twice, three times before you start sending out that mail. Is it compelling? Are you doing it consistently? Have you put results measurement in place?)

P.S. This isn’t just a big clueless company system disconnect problem. I still get big glossy postcards from a printer I’ll never use again after their terrible disservice.

Related Posts: Am Ex Is Wasting Their Marketing Budget (Again) Apparently, they’ve not heard of “merge and purge” either.
The Root Cause of Big Finance’s Meltdown

Tags: marketing, marketing troubleshooting, direct mail, small business marketing, customer service, American Express, American Express Problems

As I’ve noted in previous posts - there should be no big mystery why big companies are having BIG problems. They’ve long treated their customers like walking wallets (with an unending supply of dollars). What they’ve forgotten is that customers always have a choice. If nothing else, we can simply choose NOT to: 1. buy that new car; 2. buy the house; 3. use the credit card; 4. buy more gadgets. Some people I know even choose to NOT have any kind of health insurance (which I think is dangerous, but still…they can make that choice.)

Latest real-world example: Celtic Insurance

Recently, I tried to actually use my health insurance...that I’ve had for a year with Celtic…and which provided me a very long list of physicians who supposedly take the insurance.

No luck, No how. I went down the long list and couldn’t find a single GP/internal medicine physician that took the insurance. (And, Celtic does say that it’s “your responsibility” to check for coverage with the individual doctors. I’m sure their attorney crafted that bit. “Hey, it’s legal! We told ‘em right there on page 1.”) But what about providing the list in the first place? Hmmmm…And, it’s a sure bet the legal department never talks to the marketing department. (”Earning?” “Trust?” Isn’t that some sort of “implied contract?”…;-)

So, there I was, having paid $$ over the past year for something I can’t use. Isn’t that like fraud or something? Just for the record (since I already knew how such things go), I drop a line to Celtic. Here’s the response.

THANK YOU FOR USING CELTIC INSURANCE INTERNET SERVICE FOR YOUR INQUIRY.

I do apologize you are unable to find a provider in network in your area. Unfortunately we have no control over providers and if they participate. PHCS is the network provider and that is who the contract for providers runs through.

If you have any additional questions, please feel free to contact our Customer Service Department Monday through Friday from 9am - 6pm Eastern Standard Time at 1-800-477-7870.

Sincerely,
XXXXXXXX, Customer Service Representative ACS, third party
administrator for Celtic Insurance Company

PLEASE DO NOT RESPOND TO THIS EMAIL AS THE SENDER CAN NOT REPLY TO ANY

Ah, nothing like “third parties” and abdicating responsibility. Of course, Celtic was all kinds of responsible when it came to processing my auto payments.

My response (which I sent via the encrypted link on yet another web site since I couldn’t reply to this) was “So, you’re selling something you don’t have?” Funny. I didn’t get a response to that…;-)

I’ve switched insurance plans - to Presbyterian, since they’ve got a hospital so close I could practically crawl to it - and my insurance is strictly for catastrophes anyway. And, when I called to cancel my policy with Celtic they didn’t even ask why I was taking my wallet and walking.

Tags: marketing, marketing troubleshooting, customer service, customer retention, Celtic

In ads…or anywhere else…including probably never use the word “never.” Blah-blah-blahhhhh… Above is the second frame from one of my all-time favorite Far Side cartoons. The difference between what we say and what “they” actually hear….applies to people too, particularly when thousands of others are “talking” to us every day.

I keep forgetting about the Monday Morning Memo, from Roger H. Williams. (dang it!) His latest is Ten Things Never To Do In Advertising.

Here’s one that resonated (since I seem to be on my service soapbox this week):

6. Never claim to have exceptional service. Most people won’t believe you. And those who do believe you will expect more from your staff than they can possibly deliver. It’s a lose/lose proposition. Rather than promise exceptional service in your ads, tell the public something objective, factual and verifiable that causes them to say, “Wow. Those people really serve their customers.” Never praise yourself. Do things that make the customer praise you.

I’d add to go real easy on words like “quality,” “integrity” and “ethical.” Those should be a given.

Service is something you do - not talk about. Blah blah CUSTOMER Blah blah blah…

Tags: marketing, marketing troubleshooting, customer service, customer retention, advertising

From My “Everything You Do Is Marketing” File…”Service” sub-head.

I try very hard to do business with locally-owned businesses…but they often make it very hard for me.

Example: Printing companies. Most small firms won’t do very small jobs (not worth the time) and can’t handle very large ones. And, if you happen to fall in their magic middle (which you won’t know, unless you call…and they actually answer the phone)…they can’t turn the project around quickly, since they have to order the paper and ink.

So - yep - they continue to lose business to FedEx Kinko’s (Service is lousy, but I can get the work within 24 hours, if I’m willing to be patient with the stoner at the counter. I can even run my own.) The big jobs go to the big boys, often online companies, because: A. They’ll do the job; B. They’ll send me a proof; C. They can turn it around quickly.

Seems to me - if you’re in the printing business, you should be IN the printing business. Figure out how you can deliver what customers want - quality and quick turnaround.

Instead of spending your marketing budget trying to attract new customers (and offering things like an “express” service that’s got more conditions and restrictions than the typical health insurance policy) - be able to service the ones you already have (or could have, if you were IN the printing business.)

A company telling me they have to order the paper (and ink) is like a restaurant telling me I’ll have to wait while they drive to the market for my order ingredients. And, I’ll have to pay extra if I want to eat the meal that day. Oh, and if it turns out to be inedible, I still have to pay for those ingredients, since the cook tried and food is expensive.

Related Posts:
Small-Biz Snafus
“I’m Too Busy To Give You A Quote.”
Small Biz: Get Off Your High (Hobby) Horse

Tags: marketing, marketing troubleshooting, customer service, customer retention, small business marketing

“Cutting out the middle man” sounds great…we’ll save ALL that money…until we have a problem.

Seth Godin riffs with Where Have All The Agents Gone? in which he talks about the disappearing “middle” people such as travel agents and realtors.

“Think about how anonymous the typical real estate broker is. He will sell almost any house or represent almost any buyer. When selling a house, he has a fiduciary responsibility to represent that house to the best of his ability. Just like every other broker. The great real estate brokers do far more than this.”

These days, one computer is pretty much like another - all marketing spin aside (Yes, I love my Macs and they’re a lot different than PCs…but the basics remain the same.) So, why not buy from a computer clearing house instead of the local store? We can read specs for ourselves, right?

I can make my own travel reservations, so why should I call an agent? Ask me this next time I’m bogged down online trying to make a “simple” multi-leg reservation to and from Europe.

We can buy pretty much anything, including those computers, online…but then what happens when the thing breaks? Good luck getting attention, much less help. (Press 1 for English…Press 2 if you are a current customer…Please enter you 24-digit customer code, found on your packing slip. Press 3 if you have a network problem. Please enter your 16-digit account number. Please enter your 24-digit product code.…etc. etc.) One of my favorite signs from around town is on the locally-owned Sandia Computers marquee, “Don’t call India! Call Us!”

What’s the big deal about buying a house? Some forms. A call to the mortgage broker. You’re done. Oops, there’s a problem with the title? The repairs weren’t completed? Your “pre-approved” loan rate went up? Closing is delayed and you’ve got nowhere to live? Now what? But, hey! You saved all that money by not paying that “ridiculous” realtor commission!

One of my best friends, Donna Stark, is a realtor and she’s been dealing with the follies of the market this past year. However, I’m confident she’ll not only survive but thrive - because she does a LOT more than simply “show” houses. And, real estate isn’t a housewife hobby for her. We met when my landlord called Donna to sell the house I was renting. I subsequently worked with Donna to find my house, on a very limited budget and with even less time, particularly since the house I was renting sold very quickly (This was 3 years ago, when houses sold in a matter of days in the “hot” areas. I bought my house the second day it was on the market…and there were multiple offers.)

Even though I was a “small” client Donna cheerfully worked just as hard as if I was a multi-million dollar buyer. She drove me up, down and around. She gave me advice. And, she gave me what I call “Donna’s hairy eyeball” when I was waffling between two houses. Thanks to her, I made the right choice and now love my home and neighborhood more with each passing day (It’s really all about location, location, location…I can always add a fireplace…I can’t change geographic reality.)

So, let’s hear it for all the “invisible” people. And, keep in mind we’re ALL in the service business - regardless of our product or level of customer support. People that know this will survive. Those who don’t, won’t.

Tags: marketing, marketing troubleshooting, customer service, customer retention, US Economy

We can go on and on about immoral greed and all kinds of wonky things (derivatives, etc.) that maybe five people in the world really understand (or want to)…but the root cause is that the biggies treated - and continue to treat - their customers like walking wallets.

Real-world examples:

1. Citi continues to flood my mail box with “pre-approved” pitches for their AAdvantage card. This when I told them I canceled the card because I loathe American Airlines.

They canceled my friend’s card without any notice, since he hadn’t used it for a while.

2. “There’s nothing you can do.” A friend of mine was 10 days late on a payment (she simply got sideswiped by life for a few days.) Her interest rate immediately went up double digits and she was whacked with big interest. This when she’s had the card for years; has always paid promptly before; and has generated many thousands of dollars for the company. When she called, she was told (by a very young woman in India) that there was nothing to be done. The “manager” repeated it. My friend is closing the account, by the way. So, for one month’s interest, the company just lost thousands.

3. “According to the terms of your lease.” A local entrepreneur was late on her rent for a couple of months. The owner of the building defaulted on his mortgage. The bank kicked out the entrepreneur, since she didn’t meet her lease terms. Now the bank is stuck with a foreclosure that will likely sit empty for months, if not years (It’s a fast-food layout and would require either another similar operation or a complete renovation/redesign.)

4. “Your card has been declined.” A long-time cardholder is buying $500 of home stuff at Lowe’s. Card is declined. Turns out the company had reduced his credit limit, without telling him. (And, he’s had the card for years and a great payment record.)

5. “No, you can’t do a short sell of your home.” See above re empty foreclosure sitting and rotting. Hello? Blood. Turnips. Declining number of turnips. (Bankers - you should watch an episode or two of the foreclosure bus on HGTV…$500K houses going for $185K and so on. Reality.)

When all is said and done, this immoral and downright stupid attitude is somewhat understandable in mega companies - the people at the top are so far removed from the world, their front-line employees and their customers, it’s an alternate dimension. However, I also run into this walking wallet syndrome in smaller companies and organizations. The minute you start thinking of people as dollar signs, you’re on the downward spiral.

Related Posts:
Marketing Predators - I’d Rather Do Business With Tony Soprano
Smash & Grab Marketing

Tags: marketing, marketing troubleshooting, customer service, Citibank, American Airlines

When you called me to “follow up” you started with abruptly stating, “We’ve not received payment yet.”

Well, okay…but…We could have eased into that with “Oh, by the way, I can take your credit card over the phone and send you a receipt” AFTER we talked about my satisfaction and gotten my feedback. (There was no invoice yet either…and we’d just closed the deal a few days before.)

I realize that many businesses are working close to the bone these days…and some small businesses are always cutting it close…but…if your first priority with customers is getting paid right now, it makes them wonder: 1. How long have you been in business; 2. Will you be in business next time they need you; 3. How efficient/inefficient are you business operations - are you this desperate and sloppy in product development and support?

Related Posts:
Why You Did Get My Business
Do You “Service” or Care?
Why You Didn’t Get My Business - The Phone List
Why You Didn’t Get My Business - The Web Site List

“I’m looking for a new primary care physician. I wonder if anyone ever estimates the ‘lost opportunity’ costs of patients waiting hours to see the doctor? Three hours is too much.” - real quote from a friend

We all know the entire health care system is broken, but I recently (once again) bumped into just how broken it really is. However, I found - through a friend’s recommendation - a doctor that not only would see me the same day, but also understands customer service. Wow!

I’m normally disgustingly healthy, but recently decided I needed some help since I was heading into week three of bad head and ear aches. Let the game begin! My “primary care physician” from 18 months ago is no longer practicing, so I start calling the list provided by my insurance company. Uh-ohhh - many of the physicians listed as general practice are actually specialists. Others are no longer in practice. I couldn’t find anyone who takes my insurance…or new patients. The one I did find who was taking new patients (Never mind the insurance. I’ve got a huge deductible and by now I’ve been on the phone for two hours)…had his first opening in late April.

So, I’m whining to a friend and she tells me about STATMed.(WOM! alert) Hey, that sounded familiar. Sure enough, I’d written a post in 2007 about the doctor and her problems with marketing. Dr. Near made the common mistake of confusing advertising with marketing. But, here’s what she gets very right about marketing. (Remember - everything you do is marketing.)

1. The STATMed web site tells me what, where, how, including pricing for different levels of service. Dr. Near doesn’t take insurance, but her rates are very reasonable (particularly when you consider the increasing co-pays of insurance companies).

2. Her receptionist actually answered the phone (on the second or third ring). She was polite, friendly and, practically before I could finish my sentence, offered me two choices for an appointment the same day. Truly amazing - she called me back in a few minutes, asking if she could move me from 11:30 to 11:45 - instead of making me wait when I got there. My jaw almost hit my desktop.

3. I had to wait all of about 5 minutes. I barely had time to fill out the new patient form and sit down with a magazine…and they called me back.

4. The facility is clean and well-organized. My first stop was “Triage 1″ where the nurse checked my blood pressure, temperature and (sigh) weight, using up-to-date equipment.

5. I barely got seated in the next room before Dr. Near knocked. And, she was both friendly and professional. I instantly got the impression she cared about me, not just my symptoms.

6. Dr. Near is aware of patient’s budgets and insurance for prescriptions. She told me where I could get the best deal, with or without insurance. “Doctors don’t think about insurance.” - Pharmacist heard talking to patient at the pharmacy where I got my prescription filled (for $20 versus the “typical” $92.) Well, Dr. Near does.

7. She provided a pre-formatted one-page treatment info sheet, which clearly and concisely told me what to do and when. (I’m keeping this one on file, because it had several bits of info I can use for the next time I get a cold.)

I was in and out in under an hour. (They also gave me a biz card magnet - nice touch, which I’m sure many Moms keep on the fridge. Right there, top of mind and others can also see it. “Hey, is this STATMed any good, Linda?”

Dr. Near and I also managed to fit in some discussion of her biz model (which I think is great) and her marketing. “People don’t realize how hard it is to simply run a small business!” she said. Yep - and that’s one of the biggest reasons entrepreneurs fail. They’ve got passion, expertise, and smarts…but the sheer weight of the mundane can kill ‘em.

I was glad to hear that, despite her earlier missteps in marketing, she’s doing well. And, I’d submit that’s due to her service (word gets around), which no advertising campaign can do for you.

Oh - and seems I’ve got a galloping sinus infection, which already feels better. Thanks, Dr. Near!

Wait, there’s more - they sent me a “Welcome to our practice” card and everyone signed it.

Update - 03-06-09: I called today to get a prescription refill since the sinus infection seems to be re-emerging…I got right in, saw Dr. Near…and she didn’t charge me for the office visit.

Now, if I could find a dentist who works on Fridays….

Tags: customer service, marketing, marketing troubleshooting, customer service, STATMed, health care