Mary Schmidt Marketing Troubleshooter

Sounds simple, doesn’t it? But, doesn’t it seem like anger is a goal of some companies? (And their IVR systems are specifically designed to make our heads explode…;-)

Earlier this week I got what looked like a mass mailing from AAA. Normally this stuff goes right into recycling, but for whatever reason, I opened this one…to see big red letters! THIRD REQUEST. RESPOND IMMEDIATELY! AAA simply HAD TO HAD HAVE the questionnaire back from me re odometer reading and drivers or they’d cancel my auto insurance. Of course, they’ve had my money since April (and no claims.)

So, I call and ask why they were threatening me. The nice woman tried to walk it back when I noted that GEICO (20+ years as a customer) never asked for such things (or threatened to cancel my insurance.) “We might be able to lower your rate with a current odometer reading, since we use mileage as one of our calculations.” Uh-huh. GEICO also uses mileage.

Hmmm…the company might be able to help me…so they begin by threatening me. Way to engage with your customer! Drive ‘em to your competitor.

Now, normally I’d probably have rolled my eyes, filled out the form and moved on. But, AAA picked the wrongggggg day to dance on my last quivering nerve. Long story short, I went back to GEICO that very day (and saved a big chunk of change.)

Then, when I called AAA to cancel I was told I’d have to fill out a hard copy form and fax or mail back (Uh, now I’ve got to dig up a stamp too. Wonder if I have any left from Xmas?) “Can’t I do it online?” “Can I scan it in and email it? “No. And, we don’t accept outside emails.” And, whoever wrote the call center scripts needs some help. The AAA rep didn’t even ask why I was canceling. (There should be a big red flashing sign in the service center whenever someone calls to cancel. OPPORTUNITY!)

Funny. I can pay online, lickety-split. Luckily, there’s an AAA office not far from home. The agent even filled out the form for me. I was a former customer in about three minutes.

I still like AAA’s road/travel service but with this snafu, I’m looking for other options to that as well.

P.S. GEICO sent me an email offering to cancel the previous insurance for me. Hmmm…

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That’s obviously different than “in the dark.” (And don’t we often feel like we spend way too much time working our way through the murk with vendors?)

The other hot, sunny day I walked past the Apple store. People were standing in line to get in (yes, Standing.In.Line – to spend money, in this godawful, woe is us, we’re all doomed economy.) What really rocked my world is there was also store staff standing by the line, holding great big umbrellas and doing their best to keep the customers in the shade. Wow!

Compare that to – oh, let’s say – The Radio Shack, Best Buy, or virtually any other retail operation. Apple understands retail sales is all about the total experience, not just the store full of products.

Nice positive moment, having just come from a restaurant where the clueless hostess bluntly informed us there would be a “20 to 25 minute” wait (take it or leave it, no skin off her young nose)…when we’re standing there looking at empty tables. Uh-huh.

P. S. I don’t think we’re all doomed, but we do need to change from an economy based on mindless mass consumerism.

Yes, I brought Apple’s incredibly sophisticated system to its knees, armed with only a credit card and a keyboard.

I recently bought a game for a friend’s iPad – did the usual “send an email with the code” for his b’day.  Easy peasy,  right?

Wrong.  Long story short – after hours on the phone with iTunes, my friend gave up.  Apple escalated the “bug” way up the techie food chain.   When asked (finally) if they could simply give him a different code – the answer was “nope” -  due to technical error. They HAD to fix that bug!

I finally emailed and asked for a refund.  I got it, but only after I had to send them a copy of my electronic receipt with the order number (that they – ahem – generated in the first place.)

My friend reports that Apple claims the bug is finally fixed.  But my friend doesn’t have his game and Apple is out ten bucks.

Here’s what they should have done.

When my friend first called – they should have issued a new code.  If there was a problem with that code, they should have issued a credit to be used for something else.

They should also have given my friend the option to stay on the line while they tried to rectify the issue right then.

Concurrently, if I asked for a refund – it shouldn’t have required my sending them their own info, and having to dig through their web site to find a way to make the request, since I couldn’t – duh – reply to Apple’s “Do Not Reply” email that included my receipt.

Apple – “cool” company that it may be – did exactly what so many “uncool” companies have done for decades.  They focused on fixing their internal system problem…instead of fixing the customer’s problem.

CenturyTel is now CenturyLink. yippee.

“CenturyLink was selected as the brand name to reflect a forward-looking company that is committed to linking the country together, connecting people and creating opportunities,” the company said in a statement.

CenturyTel – ur – CenturyLink is the future owner of Qwest – which provides my phone, internet and television service. As a customer, I couldn’t care less what they name the company – a name doesn’t affect my service or price. As a customer and a marketer – I can only wonder and ponder at the time and dollars that went into this NEW name. Time and dollars that could be far better spent on something such as improving the customer billing process or service.

Oh there I go again…

You don’t need sophisticated systems to “manage customers” or detailed plans for customer loyalty creation.

You DO need people with some common sense and common courtesy. This week, I had a wonderful service experience with Coldwater Creek – all because of one person, Terri.

I had bought a top in several colors – and, wouldn’t you know it – my very favorite one (gray) started raveling at the neck after one (very careful) hand washing. I dreaded going back with it, anticipating a battle of wills with CC. But, no battle! Terri immediately credited my card and then – to my happy amazement – volunteered to try to find a replacement, while I looked around or came back later. (Note that this particular item is no longer available at the local store). She went online and also checked the outlet. No luck. “Let me try one more thing” she said. Terri then started calling stores across the U.S.! Luckily for her she found my top in the second phone call. (”Only 8 more calls to go.”) It’s shipping to me from someplace in Tennessee.

So, if you’re ever in Albuquerque – check out the local Coldwater Creek shop and ask for Terri. She’ll take care of you.

I might have said that – if there had been soap in the shower at Ojo Caliente.  There I was – all relaxed and feeling oh-so-mellow – after hours of soaking, massage, salt rub and sauna.  Then I get to the shower – and no soap…or shampoo…or extra towels.   Not only did this dampen my mellow feelings – it was also a missed marketing opportunity for the spa.

People are much more likely to buy things  – as part of an experience…and when they’ve tried them.

Multiply the lack of soap (and shampoo) by six (the total in our group) and the amount of the lost sales adds up quickly (lotion would have been great too.)

There could have been (small, classy) signs in the locker room telling us we could buy the complete spa pampering set (that we’d just tried) in the gift shop…and oh, by the way, you get a 15% discount as part of your spa package today.  Ojo has a lovely gift shop, but there was no incentive to visit it.

We’ll go back, but…we’ll  take our own soap.

I love the Albuquerque library system. It makes me happy simply to walk into one of the many branches, staffed by knowledgeable, helpful people. (I also enjoy walking into the Apple store…hey, we’re gonna have FUN!)

Who’d thunk fusty old book people have anything to teach a marketer?  Well, marketers take heed:

Librarians know they need loyal users, and lots of them.

The staff acknowledges your presence; they’re responsive; they try to help; they’ll occasionally cut you a break, overriding the “rules.” (This is how I know the check-out limit is – ahem – 50. ) Compare this to the last time you visited a big box store or called a “customer service” phone number.

The online system is streamlined and very user-friendly. Once you set up your account, which takes about a minute, the world is yours. You can search on any number of terms and keywords; you can place holds (on books AND DVDs) and they’ll be delivered to your local branch for pick-up. You’ll also get an email telling you the holds are ready for pick-up. The library is my own personal Amazon and Netflix system, rolled into one convenient, free package, accessible at a couple of clicks.

The library buyers know people have a wide variety of tastes and needs. Personally, I really appreciate whomever keeps buying Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Season 8 (Yes, a comic.) I’m equally grateful for whomever buys all those ponderous tomes of military history and sociological research.

…but that Dewey Decimal System continues to baffle me…and I worked in the high school library eons ago…;-)

Related Posts:
What A Veterinarian  Can Teach High-Tech Marketers
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Delta recently announced they were upping their checked baggage fees again, but – not to worry – “Delta’s bag fees continue to be competitive,” said Delta spokeswoman Susan Chana Elliott. “The increase is a result of continued cost pressures on our business.”

“Competitive?” What about “customer-friendly?” Certainly, the fee may be in line with other airlines…but most passengers aren’t happy at all (to put it mildly) with airlines these days.

Delta has “cost pressures” so once again, the customer is treated like a walking wallet with no choice.

I could almost understand it if the fee ensured quality service. But, it doesn’t, as evidenced by the group of people standing around the Atlanta airport at midnight on Christmas, wondering if their bags were someplace more fun.

Here’s hoping the masterminds at Delta’s HQ don’t spend much time wondering why they have such a problem with “carry-on” luggage slowing down departure times.

Me – I’m hoping Southwest will continue to expand their service, so I can stop flying Delta all together. (Southwest allows two checked pieces of baggage per ticketed Customer.)

Related Posts:
I Want Whatever United Is Smoking
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I was considering canceling my DirectTV, since between Hulu, online viewing, the local library, Red Box, and Netflix, I could (probably, do I dare cut the boomer baby cord?) do without it. Netflix worked well during the two-week free trial and I could also catch up on lots of old, classic movies. But, not so fast…

Today I looked at my credit card activity. Netflix had billed me (and I still have their email confirming the cancellation as the free trial was ending.)

Well – that make me cranky, but the major reason I’m not re-activating is communications.

I can’t respond to Netflix. The email I sent in reply to the cancellation came back as – you guessed it – undeliverable.

I can’t email Netflix at all. I have to call them. No thanks. I’ve not got the time to sit on hold waiting to fix their mistake.

Then, I was disconcerted to see my account still “exists” online – “all” I have to do to click on re-activate. If I cancel an account, I want it gone, including my address, email and credit card info (which obviously Netflix still has and is abusing.)

Now, none of this is life-threatening. But – geez, it’s 2010 already – electronic, online billing and communications should be simple; the technology certainly exists. We’re not talking complex transactions here. And, you should always, always, always be available to your customers (Compare and contrast this to a question I sent to a restaurant gift card – I got an answer within the hour!)

If you’re going to do ebiz – do ebiz.

P.S. I called DirectTV and got a better deal. Never hurts to ask.

NYT Editorial: Credit Card Chicanery
Credit Cards or Credit Crash, The Assault on Customers Continue (Georges Ugeux, Chairman and CEO, Galileo Global Advisors)
Pay or Walk? Annual Credit Card Fees Test Limits

I called a friend yesterday – she was so mad she could barely talk. A long-time Bank of America customer, she’s been slapped with all kinds of “new” conditions – and, of course, associated fees. For example, seems that now if you pay online (for your convenience, natch) – your payment may or not be credited that day (or even that week…sorr-ee, weekends aren’t “business days.”) and there’s an escalating scale of fees depending on the date and time of day. And, ta-da! – they told you (somewhere…on the back of a form, in teeny type…in a snail mail you may not have received…), so what are you complaining about?

Not only is this sleazy, it’s downright stupid. Here they are – touting how easy it is to do biz online with them – unless it’s not to their advantage. There’s no reason for any kind of delay, thanks to always-on web and data processing technology these days.

So, perhaps BofA should stop spending bazillions on commercials showing us “how easy it is to pay bills online”…or Oh-Ah!, this is cutting edge (circa 1995): “check your balance ONLINE!”…and use the dollars to send their executives back to school…for a course in basic integrity. Better yet – suck it up, step it up and hire some new people at the top (Hello? BofA board?) and, maybe they should re-think those bonuses too…

(And my friend will soon be a former BofA customer.)