Mary Schmidt Marketing Troubleshooter

I’m a big believer in having a plan A, B, and even C. However, this requires us to step outside our comfortable, well-worn, “proven” assumptions and the status quo.

This is why otherwise smart people didn’t understand how anyone could possibly want something like a home PC, telephone, or fax machine. We didn’t have them, so why would we want them? (Yes, Virginia - fax machines were once leading, bleeding cutting edge.)

Also, we tend to view the future in terms of the present. Things won’t change, right? Things like cheap oil, for instance. How many industries are now suffering because we’re finally paying what Europeans have been for years? (In fact, we’re still paying less at the pump than other countries). Everything from long-haul trucking (obvious) to restaurants (not so obvious.) Once one domino falls…

Two “What If” tips:

1. If you find yourself saying, “but that would never happen…” then have a plan for it happening. Or at the very least, be aware so you can react in time. (The time to change a strategy is when it’s still working.)

2. If it makes you uncomfortable to think about…think about it.

Tags: business development, strategy, strategic planning

Lots is written about airlines - their horrible service, their financial woes, the rising costs of jet fuel, the problem of increasingly overweight passenger bodies reducing fuel efficiency, battles with the unions, safety issues, etc. etc. I’ve written several posts myself about airlines. And, there’s really no excuse for making it a policy to treat your customers badly.

All that said - here’s the root cause of their woes. Cheap-o travel. The airlines made tickets so affordable that “everybody” got into the habit of flying. And the airlines got used to having hordes flying. Basic economics and pricing methodologies (and marketing common sense) went out the window.

When I first started flying, over 30 years ago, travel was more civilized. Then, gradually, things changed. People that normally would have taken the bus or train or driven…started herding onto the planes, clutching bed pilows and whacking me in the head with leaking bags of goodies for the grandkids. Note: Before you think me an elitist snob - when I was a child, we did a lot of business with Greyhound and we drove many thousands of miles. Daddy loaded us in the car (no air conditioning) and we were lucky to get one bathroom break every 400 miles…

It couldn’t last - and now the airlines are (desperately) trying to keep “everybody” flying. The trend is to charge for everything - right down to those disgusting pillows. (I’d love to sit in on an airline financial meeting, “Yes, we project that we can make $250M on pillow rentals this year!”)

As Maureen Rogers notes in Air Fair, why don’t the airlines charge a price at which they can make a fair profit? They’re going through downsizing anyway - why not try a different business model? One that would enable them to make a profit and still provide good service.

Watching the entire airline industry struggle and crumble is a good lesson for all of us. You can’t be all things to all people - and “everybody” isn’t a sustainable market.

P.S. Maureen also gives a great example of marketing blah-blah spin…by an “industry analyst” no less. “Ultimately, they [the traveler] will be more satisfied because they will be in control of their travel experience,” said Henry Harteveldt, principal airline analyst for Forrester Research Inc. The folks at Forrester are usually smart…but they also make money selling research to industries, such as the airlines…so they’re going to sprinkle a little feel-good dust on their stuff.

Related Post: I Want Whatever United is Smoking.

Tags: emarketing, marketing, marketing troubleshooting, customer service, United, Airline problems, American Airlines customer service, American Airlines problems, Airline problems

This past weekend, I was in New Orleans celebrating my - um - 29th birthday…I had previously called Commander’s Palace for a dinner reservation. Not only did they answer within two rings, they were both efficient and effective. No being put on hold while they found the book, no transfers, no long waits. And, when finished (this all took about a minute), the woman said, “My name is _________and if you need anything else, darlin’ - call me.”

(Being called darlin’, honey, sugar, and sweetheart is just the way it is in New Orleans. You find yourself doing it with waiters, cab drivers, shop keepers…and it works there.)

So, once again I ask why is it so hard for companies to:

B. Prepare their employees to both efficiently and effectively handle callers? (Those godawful “policies” you can’t go against are efficient.).

C. Understand that every inbound customer call is a golden marketing opportunity? Somebody wants to talk to you!

And, note to all sizes and types of companies: please don’t tell me “we can’t afford it.” I know all the rationales - I used to develop, package and manage call center and software support services - and have run my share of cost analysis spreadsheets.

Everything You Do is Marketing! Can the commercials and focus on the inbound calls.

Read More: Seth Godin’s insightful semi-rant post, Who Answers The Phone?

Related Posts:
Why You Didn’t Get My Business - The Phone List
Customer Service Tip: Hire Grandmothers
Customer Relationship Management: Control or Comfort?

Tags: customer service, business development, marketing troubleshooting

This shows up in my in-box - New White Paper: Five ways to increase efficiency while cutting costs The pitch is:
With rising expectations to deliver immediate and personalized service and support in businesses of all sizes, organizations in the midmarket are coming under increasing pressure to do so with fewer resources. In turn, organizations must find new ways to optimize operational and business process efficiency. Read this paper for a look at five challenges facing organizations today and how a secure network can provide your business with a new way of doing business to improve efficiency and cut costs.

Run! Run! It’s the Attack of the Corporate Crap Monster!

This “free” paper, “sponsored by Cisco” may well have some great things in it. But, I’ll never know because:

1. The title and summary bore the bejesus out of me. (Why not call it, “5 Things You Can Do To Save Money and Still Blow ‘em Away With Your Service.” Yeah, that needs work, but I wrote it in about 1.5 seconds…) And, what the Hell is the “midmarket?” Am I part of it? Do I care? What? What?

2. It’s another very poorly disguised “lead generation” c’mon. When I click on the “learn more” link to verify my suspicions…yep, I land at IDC where I have to click again to get to this form…to get TWO WHOLE PAGES. That’s one page more than the flippin’ form.

You also have to notice (among all the BIG BOLD type and yadda-yadda) and click on a box next to this shadowy tiny text to NOT receive anything else.

Not only does IDC not have me as a “lead” - I’m now predisposed against any pitch they may give me.
(Tip: Forcing people to fill out a long form does not mean they’re a lead, much less a good one.)

Related Posts:
Oh Boy! A Free Account Review!
Hello Am Ex? Free Should Be Free

Want truly free stuff from me? Go to - ta-dah! - Free Stuff. You can also sign up to download my free Marketing Troubleshooter Guide and receive a short monthly eletter (up there at the left.) All I need is your name and email address. And, nothing else will be popping up in your inbox but the monthly eletter.

P.S. Yes, that photo is exactly what it looks like.

During WWII the American GIs, trying to be good guys as they advanced through the French countryside, would diligently work to move ginormous manure piles out of farmers’ yards. The farmers moved the stuff right back. Next group of GIs move it…Farmers (sigh) move it back. And round and round they went. Puzzled GIs, “Why do they have all this crap in their yards?” Increasingly ticked-off farmers, “Why do this clueless people keep moving my great pile of merde?”

Don’t say you never learn anything here.

Tags: emarketing, business development, marketing troubleshooting, IDC

When doing one of my Entrepreneur Sanity Check consultations, the first question I ask is, “Why are you doing this?”

If the answer is something like the following:

“I’ve got three kids and I want more flexibility.” This, recently coming from a young single Mom, was when I had to bite my tongue hard to keep from blurting, “Are you #!&#ing crazy?”
“I want to be the boss.”
“I want to take time off whenever I feel like it.”
“I want to make more money.”

(You micro and small biz owners out there - please stop laughing so hard, you could sprain something…and you probably don’t have disability insurance.)

And then, if after more discussion, the would-be entrepreneur still seems unrealistic, my best advice - couched in as tactful language as I’m capable - is “Don’t do it.” I’m all for taking chances and [aarghh] “following your passion,” but that’s just it - if you don’t have the passion, you’re not going to be too happy out on your own. It’s long, hard hours; everyone is your boss; and if you don’t work, you don’t eat.

And, even if you are passionate (about software, cupcakes, plumbing, art, whatever) - you also have to do a lot of “crap” work that you don’t like just to keep the business running.

It’s as simple, hard, fun, boring, exhilarating, exhausting as all that.

However, you can still be entrepreneurial when working for someone else - if it’s the right someone and you’ve got the right perspective. (I’ve had some great “real” jobs - even in big bad Corporate America.)

Related Posts:
Business is Hard. (Duh)
Can You Learn To Be An Entrepreneur?
How Do I Become A Consultant?
Start-Up Success: What Do You Wanta Be When You Grow Up?

Thinking you might need a sanity check? You can start by downloading the one-page PDF, Entrepreneur Sanity Checklist - 15 of the questions I typically ask in my Entrepreneur Sanity Check consultations. Everybody and every idea is different, but the basics remain the same.

I also do Sanity Checks via phone. Drop me a line if you’d like to know more. I won’t abuse your email address. No “special deal” or “limited time offers” junk. You’re not a “lead’ - you’re a person with a question.

Tags: entrepreneur success, entrepreneurship, entrepreneur sanity check, start-up success

Microsoft bids $44.6 BILLION for Yahoo.

Great idea! Those big company mergers are always a great solution! That AOL/Netscape deal went so well...and Sprint/Nextel is showing record profits…(oh, wait…huh, No and uh, No.)

Yahoo? Are they still in business?

“Not a single company that qualified as having made a sustained transformation ignited its leap with a big acquisition or merger. Moreover, comparison companies—those that failed to make a leap or, if they did, failed to sustain it—often tried to make themselves great with a big acquisition or merger. They failed to grasp the simple truth that while you can buy your way to growth, you cannot buy your way to greatness.” —Jim Collins/Time/2004 (via Tom Peters)

Read More: Vindu’s View: Google would be big winner from a Microsoft-Yahoo deal

Tags: business development, mergers, Microsoft, Yahoo

Type in my name and there I am.

“But, what about spammers?”
“But what about crazy people?”
“But what if they don’t like what I say?”

I’ve heard all of these from people who want to do biz in the Web 2.0, Word-of-Mouth, Viral, Interactive, Facebookin’, Twitterin’ Widget Web World - but, but, but…

Here’s the thing: If you want to be found, you can’t be timid.

You can’t build a web site and hope only nice people will somehow find you and give you money.

You can’t have a “safe” blog. Safe means nobody will read it anyway. And you never know what’s going to set crazies off - they’re crazy, remember?

Word-of-Mouth means you’re not in control. Some of those mouths are going to be attached to people who do not like you - no matter what you do.

I’m selling my brain and my point-of-view - so that means my brand is - well - Mary Schmidt. Not the most exciting name on the planet I grant you - but it’s mine and I do my best for my brand to mean something.

I use my name on all my comments on all types of blogs. If I’m gonna say it, I’ve got to own it. And, as “Mary Schmidt” I’ve met many new friends and several clients through posts on other blogs (including one where I was decidedly snarky about a women’s group. A woman read it and became a client.)

I give you my phone number on every page. And, I answer my own phone. (Yes, I got a couple of threatening voice mails from a crazy (and apparently drunk) woman last year. I wonder if she’d said the same things if I’d answered. Hmmmm….it’s easy to talk tough to a machine…or on blog comment.)

As Popeye says, “I yam what I yam.” I’m not everyone’s favorite flavor (or cartoon character. Friends tell me that in my case that would be the Looney Tunes Tasmanian Devil.) However, this saves everyone a lot of time. If you don’t like what I’m saying here - you won’t like working with me. So, we don’t have to do the sales and proposal dance. Makes for better business for everyone.

The New Virtual Business Model. I want to stay a sole proprietor “craftswoman.” I’m all about quality of life these days - but I also like to make money. Doing biz on the Web makes both possible. I can work with people all over the world and I can instantly jump on opportunities undreamed of even five years ago.

The Wild Wild Web is a great place to work and play - but you’re going to have to stop the - um - “butting.”

Related Post: Our Wild, Wacky, Wonderful Widget Economy. It’s simpler than ever to build a biz, if you think outside the “safe” brick and mortar, 9-5 corporate box. Also, read more - Bruce Fryer on micro applications.

Want to browse through all my posts? Go to The Idea Pool. Everything I’ve written since I started blogging.

What do you think? Leave a comment below and feel free to disagree! Debate is healthy. I moderate all comments, though, so it may take a bit for your comment to show up.
Thanks for reading!

Tags: web marketing, marketing troubleshooting, business development, widget economy

Eminently practical.
Often needed.
Totally uncommercial.

And so it goes with a lot of ideas - which is why “technology transfer” often doesn’t work.

Tags: entrepreneur sanity check, marketing, marketing troubleshooting, technology transfer, product development

A post by Jackie Huba at Church of the Customer about Invisible Companies in Austin poked one of my pet peeves…

If I can’t find you on the Web:

I wonder how long you’ve been in business. Are you capable of doing business in today’s super-connected, always-on world in which I work?

I wonder if you’re going to be in business long enough to help me.

and…I’ll call someone else - who does show up in my search results (complete with phone number and location.)

Of course, some businesses do “just fine” without a Web presence. However, I recall one local shop owner who very confidently told me he wasn’t at all worried about competition from web sites and that’s why he didn’t need one. “Nobody else offers what we do.” He sells beads and jewelry-making supplies. Um, ever done a Google search?

What’s really bizarre is when self-anointed marketing experts and web design firms are invisible…or if you do manage to find them (on the second, third, or fourth page of search results) - have really terrible, broken sites, with badly written content, outdated info, empty pages, etc. etc.

(Tip to my small biz readers: You can quickly have a good starter web site using off-the-shelf free software such as Wordpress. You can set up just about all of it on your own without having to get all techie. Don’t be put off by it being “blog” software. This site is done in WP. )

P.S. Don’t put your Web address on your biz card or packaging until you have a site, with content. I wanted to order a lot of cookies this past holiday season from a local entrepreneur….oops, the site isn’t up.

Just as one person’s trash is another’s treasure…one person’s “easy to use” is another’s “OH MY GOD! What do I do??? What? What?”

This applies to everything from easy toilet repairs (takes me hours to do what a plumber could do in minutes) to writing marketing copy. (“Hey, marketing is easy, I’ll just read a book!”)

And so we come to writing that copy. I’ve been working with a client for over a year now - thinking, talking, writing, rewriting, packaging, repackaging, talking some more…Part of the challenge is how to talk about “ease of use” in ways that are meaningful to someone other than the developer or a super tech geek.

As the Web poobahs at GrokDotCom note in yesterday’s post re web copy:

Just remember, “easy to use” won’t reassure visitors — and a visitor with doubts usually clicks away, fast. If you want her to buy, you’ll have to give her credible assurances that are tailored to her real anxieties.

This advice also applies to any type of communications. Simply saying something is “easy” doesn’t cut it. You’ve got to put some thought into how it’s easy - and if it really is for someone other than you. (And, if you say “it’s easy to sell” to a distributor, tell them why…and how…)

Related Posts:
No, I Won’t Write Your Brochure.
Marketing is Easy! I’ll Just Read A Book!